the F rant

For the first time in the holiday, it’s raining. It’s not bad, except that it’s still about 30, bloody humid and we’re inside still playing Medal of Honour. I must say, there’s something rather bizarre about playing a game whose main aim is to kill Germans whilst being in Germany and the menus and voiceovers are all in German. German born and bred Mauri gets a weird kick out of it.

Ecuador have looked good all tournament, but Germany made them look like amateurs. They smashed the Ecuadoreans 3-0, Miroslav Klose doing the damage again with a brace. Lucas Podolski scored the other one. I reckon he’s going to be a star. There are a lot of those young German guys who are playing extremely well in the World Cup.  Fair enough they’re on home soil and playing above themselves, but nevertheless, give them a few years of development and they’ll be even better.

Podolski, Schweinsteiger, Hitzlsperger but above all, Phillip Lahm; the goal he scored in the opening game was a scorcher. Great off the left full back, I wouldn’t be surprised if Real Madrid makes a bid for him when Roberto Carlos finally hangs up his feisty left boot.

FOOTY: Sport in general

We got up after a couple of hours sleep and went to SeeHaus for lunch.

Truly one of the best lunches I’ve had in a long time. I managed to SMS Avee to join us but the poor bloke got home at about 6:30am so he wasn’t in any mood for lunch at 2:00pm.

The thing is, we had to eat and get back to Stuttgart for the Spain v Tunisia game, so we loaded up our plates and sat by the lake in the sun for a little while. I ate this thing called Schweinsachse. It was like a pork crab claw. A huge drumstick of pork wrapped in crackling the likes of which I have never tasted before.

STUNNING is the best to put it.

We got into the car and found ourselves stuck in horrendous bumper to bumper traffic on the autobahn. We literally stopped on the autobahn, with a snake of stationary cars as far as the eye could see.

We cranked up the 2Live Crew and pulled out the soccer ball Eddie had given us – and played some one-two passing between the cars for half an hour or so before we got going again. It was bloody good, like something from a Coke ad.

The problem only occurred when Micha put on some dreadful movie – Underworld Revisited or something – on the inbuilt DVD player and commenced watching it while driving at a conservative 160km/h.  It meant that much needed sleep was impossible.

Micha dropped us off, so while he and Marcus went off on their own journey, Mozza, Enrico and I went back to the Gottlieb Daimler Stadion.  There we were – our second visit to a real World Cup Match – Spain v Tunisia, and four goals scored, all at the other end of the ground!

Great game though, unreal. Spain look really good, I reckon they could be a surprise packet. Back at the Stuttgart Bahnhof, I picked up some elite chocolate for Marcus, who was by that time back at Mozza’s place, playing XBox. 99% Cocoa. It tasted like rooobish.

We played Medal of Honour, Germans vs Allies (the game totally in German – in itself was an incredibly strange, but highly enjoyable experience) until the sun rose over southern Germany. A bloody good day and night (and beginning of the next day). Extremely knackered. Bedtime.

FOOTY: Sport in general

What a stunning day. OK, Australia got beaten by the Brazilians, but it was a bloody good effort. The referees were afraid to give a free kick to the Brazilians. Rubbish. But one positive note – Japan drew with Croatia, which I reckon is VERY good for Australia. If we draw with Croatia or better, we’re through into the next round.

But what a lineup of Aussies walking the streets: Harry was there, looking resplendent in his Socceroos guernsey, Avee had a “leave pass” from the wife and kids and was representing with his brother Alex at the Footy Show, even Andrew Schauble was there, in the little beer garden near Marienplatz, the Augustiner Biergarten. It was too crazy trying to get into the beer haus, crazy, they had cops out the front trying to stop any more people coming in.

The Augustiner beer garden was GREAT, so relaxed, so full of great people. Obviously, Marcus, Mozza, Micha and I were there – but so was Matteo, Ben from Crikey.com.au and the warm up guy from The Footy Show.

Bloody funny, especially when the South Koreans equalled France – the place went bezerk.

Highlights of the night:
Aussie don’t have chants. So what do Aussies (in particular Melburnians) do when confronted with a lack of communal singing opportunities?
That’s right, they start singing the Erik Planinsek advertisement.

Two.
Two Thirty.
Two Thirty Brunswick Street
Two Thirty Brunswick Street, Fitzroy.
Remember.
Remember Erik.
Remember Erik Planinseks.
Remember Erik Planinseks Winter Sale.

Lowlights of the night:
My phone ran out of batteries at about midnight so I totally lost contact with Avee, Harry and the other boys I was hoping to catch up with.  But on a high note, the taxi driver taught us an expression on the way home and begged us to remember it.  Fotzelecker.  I don’t know what it means, but if you speak German, please place a comment below translating it into English please.

FOOTY: Sport in general

What a big show!

Eddie was cool, spotting me in the Pies jumper and shooting me a ball. Simple Minds, Ronan Keating, Tina Arena, Live, Colin Hay and WARNEY!

FOOTY: Sport in general, FUN: Music, Culture and Entertainment

Outside the Footy Show in Munich and the place was swarming with Aussies. Crazy. I ran into Hector, the old Joy customer and funny bloke. Marcus was highly offended by the sign outside the theatre, Der Deutschen Kunst.

FOOTY: Sport in general, FUN: Music, Culture and Entertainment

Mozza had to coach his team in a series of Qualifying finals, so Marcus and I caught up, shopping and exploring the streets of Stuttgart.

Bloody good, even if we got lost in a Department store. While in the crystal department, we were comparing prices of excellent wine decanters when we made the sick realisation that we were turning into old bastards. There was a time when we would have been in the electronics section, comparing the physics suites of numerous first person shooter games, but now… Marcus told me to shove it up my ORREFORS.

We had a glance at Portugal v Iran over a coffee, but it wasn’t much of a contest. Portugal looked good, Iran didn’t.

Then Landes Pavilion. Mozza was shit scared. Italy was shit. A great early goal, an own goal by Zaccardo and then Italy self destructed. De Rossi elbowed a yank in the nose and got sent off, it was all downhill from there. Italy 1-1 USA. We got a bit pissed, a bit tired, then ate some OUTSTANDING currywurst at a really cool wurst bar which stocked Veuve Clicquot and Evian. Very cool.

FOOTY: Sport in general

The Dutch are funny bastards. They love getting pissed and wearing oranje. And they love soccer. And they take NOTHING seriously.  Look carefully at the statue of the founder of Baden-Wuttemburg.

FOOTY: Sport in general

Seriously, the Dutchies were MENTAL. It was great stuff. Check out the Dutchies up the top of the three storey fountain.

After this, we walked over to a little “German Food Fest” right near the Fan Fest. I gorged myself on ‘real’ German food: Fleisschgeist, which is some weird baked bacon thing, this raw meat on bread with onions, this sort of baked spinach pork ravioli thing; I’d hate to see what my cholesterol readings are.

FOOTY: Sport in general